So its been a few weeks since my last blog, thought i would take a minute to go into the full brunt of hypothyroidism...
I was put on my cytomel (short acting thyroid medicine) from March 2nd to March 16th... then nothing. I went to visit my brother for a week which was FANTASTIC... North Carolina really is a very pretty and such a CLEAN place... like really they have signs posted to list how clean each place is right down to their elevators- i swear u could lick the ground in the elevators and how many places can u say that LOL
I digress...
So the first week was ok i got tired but still could walk around and symptoms were pretty mild. I was able to craft and crochet, I was able to clean a bit and walk the dog... it really wasnt that bad... yet...
I was also instructed to start a LOW IODINE diet. Thats not low salt... its LOW IODINE... problem is - since the 1930s IODINE has been added to everything... to prevent thyroid goiters dontcha know LOL... which was a big problem back then... not enough iodine in the diet... hence where salt goes iodine does also. So the only thing i can have is FRESH veggies, fruits (sadly i dont like many of them), oatmeal, pasta, rice, chicken and beef... yea... without any salt or anything packaged cooking does become a challenge. its gets boring fast... there is only so much lime paprika garlic oil salad dressing one can eat...
You really dont think how much salt we truly eat in our american diet. I cant even use mustard or ketchup. Nothing canned. Not even Sea Salt which says on the package NO IODINE ADDED... why ... because Iodine is a natural element in the ocean so when scientists tested the iodine content it was still too high!!! ARGH... I finally found some salvation in my new best friend- Kosher Salt.
** a side note on kosher. Kosher isnt an ingredient in jewish food it talks about how the food is prepared... part of that preparation involves using salt to absorb ANY of the blood and fluids in meat which is strickley prohibited in the diet. Part of this process involves taking the meat and covering it in this salt then rinsing it off. Its not used in actual consumption ONLY in preparation as such they DONT ADD IODINE to it... MEANING I CAN FINALLY EAT SALT... for those nerds like me out there just plain ole NaCl!! no fillers no addiditives nothing prepared by machine... ***
Once we got kosher salt food perked my spirits up a little. See previous to that if i had salad- i would use lots of lime juice with olive oil and spices (non salt spices) usually paprika to add flavor. I became a huge fan of cucumber and onions. got tired of chicken quickly... but onto the meat of the matter
Hypothyroidism- The bad, and the ulgy
So starting round the 19th i started to feel different... i would say bad but then a week later i really really felt bad so for now i ll only say it was just different. I took daily naps, and felt more depressed and just off altogether. Went for repeat blood test which finally showed i was ready (my tsh was 54 - only needed to be 30)... I was then told monday the second i would go to nuke med (nuclear medicine) and i assumed that starting monday i d get my pill and be on my way to finally feeling better and eating normal again...
JUST KIDDING...
Nuke Med called today to say the process will go as follows... Monday the 2nd i will get a tiny pill then go home... I ll come in Wed and do a body scan (see below )... Then i come in Thursday and FINALLY get my therapeutic dose of radiation for my cancer... and lastly on FRIDAY i will be able to resume my thyroid meds and a normal diet ... by Saturday i ll be off isolation and able to hug my husband again. I also asked if i can be bridged with my cytomel seeing how i am already so symptomatic and by the time i actually take my pills it ll be ANOTHER TWO WEEKS OF THIS MADDNESS!! (that means i ll take both long and short acting meds... it ll make my symptoms go away faster even though my blood counts will still suck )...
So thats the bummer- My TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) was almost ready on March 15th, however it spiked to 54 by March 23rd... by April 9th (when i can take meds...) i imagine its gonna be way worse than that...
On March 23rd- i had the worst night of my life!! I admit i forgot several doses of my calcium (tums)... Since the surgery i was taking up to 1600 mg elemental calcium three times daily... SO starting back in mid march when i was with my brother my hands n feet were a little tingly... kinda like you lay on your arms wrong... but that was it so i took doses when i remembered and thought nothing of it...
then it started
well that day on the 23rd i was going in to check my blood (thats the test that later came back at 54) and could barely keep my eyes open ... I had to use a wheelchair to get to and from the appt... exhausted cant cover it... it was past that. Just to raise my arm made me dizzy. And i was in such pain... i spent half the day crying- saying "its not supposed to be painful, why does it hurt?"
James was too afraid to have me take pain meds with my low metabolism. He held me tight and rubbed and kissed my forehead. It was the hardest night of our marriage and my life thus far. The dog had bad diarrhea (?not sure why) James went out 7 times in one hour to help him... both cats were re-guritating food... all in all not a good day at all... i couldnt get comfortable anywhere... it was just bad...
My body ached all over. My arms were sore, my chest was sore. it was an achy an overworked it type pain. Like acid was burning me from the inside out. i took a hot shower, laid down... covered up... Despite exhaustion I couldnt sleep cause of the pain. Everything down to breathing was a struggle. my joints were like tiny alarms going off that just fired all the time and i couldnt make them stop... I hated feeling that way. I took two extra strength tums, two extra strength tylenol and prayed. We all finally moved to the living room where i could sit up. Turned the heat on cause i was soooo cold. I spent most of the month feeling cold, but that night the temp dropped outside to 38 and inside the windows leak so bad it was in the 60s in the apt. I was covered in 5 blankets and still shivering which didnt help the pain at all... By 4 am i finally slept.
When i woke up in the am my pain was gone i was still very tired from the rough night, but us the animals and the marriage survived. I called the endocrinologist who said it was a combo of my hypothyroid with my low calcium level that did that. Needless to say i take my tums 3 times a day now and dont miss a single dose. So after reading that night you can imagine how excited i am to spend the next week and half waiting for my pill.
I am very very tired all the time. I am very very dizzy with little movement. Even if my husband moves around too fast it gives me vertigo. Once i get going i am ok but the getting up and sitting down is a little rough. I sleep 2-3 hour naps 2- 3 times a day... =( that part depresses me the most i hate sleeping the day away. I am very depressed... Doesnt help that we are having car troubles and it looks like we ll be forced into one car from now on... in order to make finances easier we will also have to move somewhere cheaper by June as well...
When it rains it pours... My pastor said God doesnt give us what he doesnt think we can handle- well this week has been very very rough- but we do endure. James and I are much much closer not just as a couple but as individuals who have struggled as well... He is doing a great job taking care of me which i know is not easy... pushed himself to places he didnt think he would go. And this month is our 6 month anniversary of marriage to boot!! Hard to imagine but yea all this in the first year of marriage.... tallk about up hill both ways in the snow with dogs chasing... I learned that is a metaphor for slow growing cancer with depression n pain and sorrow wrapped in an inability to communicate and disability with the IRS and DMV chasing us both ways with the Dept of Education loan services in a close third ... in the cold... with sick pets...
at least my phone works, tv isnt broke and i do have a really cute very well behaved puppy ... and well it can always be worse... its only 7 more days before i can take meds and start to feel normal again... you can do anything for 7 more days...
sorry this was kinda long... took me 2 days to write it all down... its kinda all over the place and as scrambled as my emotions but i hope it gives a glimpse into how im feeling and isnt too morbid... or confusing...
its naptime again so im gonna run... will try to finish an update that explains the body scans and radiation and its glory im about to experience...
Gods Blessings and Peace and good health to you all
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